Moving

Times have been busy.  To add to it, Dave and I recently moved.  We only moved across town, but after living in the same home for 23 years it can be a big project.  We are leaving the first home we ever owned, the home we spent almost half our lives in, the home we raised our children.  So many memories caught in one place.  The project has the potential to become very emotional.

Moving had crossed our minds many times over the years, but either the time wasn't right or we couldn't find the right house to keep the kids in the same schools.  Then, when we were starting to toy with the idea a few years ago, Curtis was killed.  The thought again was put on hold.  Making such a big decision in times like that is just not a good idea. 

Many memories came flooding back as I packed.  Art projects were found, Emily's little rocking chair long tucked away or Curtis' farm set that hasn't seen the light of day brought back times from years past.  Smiles instead of tears, a welcome change.  Deciding what to keep, throw or give away was painful at times. 

The most difficult project was taking down Curtis' things.  Looking at his face, feeling like I was putting him away, if only temporary, felt like I was deceiving him somehow.  But it had to be done, and I put that feeling aside and moved on.

Finally we are moved although not totally unpacked.  As I left the old house for the last time I was surprisingly unemotional.  I looked around and it already felt like the house belonged to someone else.  Our new house already felt like home.  My memories are in my mind, not in that house.  I am not leaving my memories, they are moving with me.