The Boulder

Last Sunday I attended the Scoops for Troops event in Eagan.  It is an event that was started by three other Gold Star Families.  Dave and I met our friend Jamie, and my sister and brother in law, Joy and Brian, there.  Despite the freezing weather, there was a good turn out for the run/walk. 

We set out for the 3K walk, and Joy and I with our long legs soon left the rest of our group in the dust, but it gave us time to talk.  Joy told me about a movie she had seen about a mothers loss, and the struggles she faced trying to move forward.  At one point the character asked her mother if she would ever get over this.  Her mother told her that, No, it is as if she has been given a brick to forever carry with her, sometimes an hour or even a day may go by and she will forget, but then she will put her hand in her pocket, and the brick will still be there. 

I have thought about this all week.  As always, I had to put my own twist on things.  In my life I have been given a stone, a brick and a boulder.  My father, my sister, and my son.  The stone and brick can be placed in my pockets, but I must carry the boulder on my shoulders.  The stone and brick threw my center of balance off, but the boulder has changed my life permanently.   Many people have noticed my struggle to carry it and come to help, but they always place it back where it belongs.  I someday may become strong enough to get used to the weight and not notice it as much, but it will always be there. 

Learning how to maneuver through life with this burden is the challenge.  I think Dave and I have a good start by reaching out to others, attending as many events as possible, and keeping his name, and what he stood for out there.  Maybe by doing this, even Curtis is helping to lighten the load.