Steamboat

In Curtis' senior year we took our last family vacation.  Skiing had been a fun family sport for us for many years, so we decided to go to Steamboat for a week with another family. 

We were so excited  to go our first day out that we couldn't wait for our friends to drop their youngest off at daycare, so along with their oldest daughter, Madison, we started our trek up the mountain.  After taking a couple of pictures of the kids at the top we made our first run of the morning.  It was a sunny and pleasant day.  The second run down, we stopped at the fork of two runs to chat, the one we had just gone down, and a different one.  Dave pointed to the new trail and said "Let's go!"  I hesitated for a second, my mind told me to take the first trail another time to get our legs, but I followed anyway.  Part way down we hit a cloud bank, and the visibility went to near zero.  Curtis was slightly in front of me about 15 feet to my right.  Suddenly I saw him go down hard.  I knew instantly that he would need help, so I stopped as quick as I could, which made me fall over as well.  No sooner than that, Madison zipped past me.  After the cloud of snow settled around Curtis, I realized that he wasn't there.  I couldn't figure out what had happened.  Had he slid down the hill? 

What Curtis had seen at the last minute was a cat walk that spanned the run.  There was a 2-3 foot drop with only a small sign to mark it, but it was missed by us in the low visibility.  Curtis avoided in by making a spectacular fall, and saved me from it as well.  Madison had hit it at full speed and was launched about 20 feet down the mountain.  I didn't see Curtis initially, but when I looked over the lip, I saw him running toward Madison as fast as he could.  I had always knew Curtis was a caring and sensitive kid, but that act was the first time I saw it in action.  He had smashed his face into the ground in the fall, and it was full of blood, it looked as if he had broken his nose.  It wasn't  broken, but Madison's arm was.  Thankfully the Steamboat emergency room is proficient at such things, within 4 hours, surgery included to pin her arm, Madison was back at the condo watching movies.  We had a great week of skiing, laughs, friends and family, one I will never forget. 

Each year Dave and I look forward to skiing, even after the kids have moved on.  This year we have not gone once.  Yes, we have been busy, or the weather hasn't cooperated, but the passion isn't there.  We are even taking a warm weather vacation instead of a ski trip.  We know that we will go again, maybe just not this year. 

I should have followed my gut that day, in a way I felt responsible, just as Dave did because he made the choice to go down that run.  But in the end, things happen beyond our control.  We could beat ourselves up by telling ourselves we should have done things different, should have made a different decision, we didn't.  We need to come to peace about what has happened and make better choices in the future, maybe follow that gut feeling.  But we can't be afraid of living because it has risks.